Thirty-six years ago, my son was convicted of the murder of his wife. They had a son of five months. My son was eventually released by the Appeal Court, innocent, as the Jury ’Simply Got it Wrong.” Overturning a Jury verdict was unheard of, however, another was then convicted in his place.
The effect on my family is still with us. Anger and unresolved hurts still lurk just beneath the surface. For me, well I do not know who knows our ‘family secret’ and it does not matter now, people have to make their own judgement on the person I am, and it was a long time before I reached this plateau of confidence!
I do believe I have been really fortunate with the loving, genuine support, and encouragement I received from many, many people over the years. The majority from AFFECT and the Counselling I received.
Knowing the power of the AFFECT style of support, encouraged me to consider the value (to me as well as others) of putting my own experience to good use. My terrible journey found in Affect a place to rest, restore peace of mind and see there was a way back to normal life. Not as it was, that could never be but onto an acceptable life with all its opportunities, highs and lows.
Following a Counselling Course I began Telephone Supporting. I am quite sure Affect’s approach works as well as it does is because of the degree of anonymity, our guarantee of confidential , non-judgemental support plus knowing those who come to Affect for solace, answers and someone to ‘walk with them’ for as long as they need, is achieved via out Telephone Support Workers. We are a safe place to risk exposing our agony.
A ‘new’ Family Member hears in the Telephone Supporter, they are speaking with somebody who understands their position, empathises with their pain and confusion, and most importantly listens to what they are saying, if necessary, over and over again. That is the beginning of sorting out the constant ‘whirlpool’ of thoughts. So, you see, being a Telephone Support Worker has been and is a most rewarding part of my life. I am immensely privileged to have people feel sufficiently confident to want of share their deepest thoughts with me. Trust is a precious gift, and I truly value that.